Me, Myself and I... take it or leave it... this is all I know to be...

2012-02-03T08:25:00.001-05:00

Humor is everywhere, in that there's irony in just about anything a human does. - Bill Nye

2012-02-02T06:36:00.001-05:00

Censorship, like charity, should begin at home; but, unlike charity, it should end there. - Clare Booth Luce

2012-02-01T06:00:00.001-05:00

On the whole human beings want to be good, but not too good, and not quite all the time. - George Orwell

2012-01-31T09:40:00.001-05:00

Sometimes people carry to such perfection the mask they have assumed that in due course they actually become the person they seem-WSMaugham

2012-01-31T06:11:00.001-05:00

There's an old saying about those who forget history. I don't remember it, but it's good. - Stephen Colbert

2012-01-29T19:33:00.001-05:00

"You cannot have peace, when you are avoiding life." --Virginia Wolf (The Hours 2002)

2012-01-29T11:41:00.001-05:00

The visionary lies to himself, the liar only to others. - Friedrich Nietzsche

2012-01-27T11:43:00.001-05:00

My definition of a free society is a society where it is safe to be unpopular. - Adlai E. Stevenson Jr.

2012-01-27T05:36:00.001-05:00

Television has done much for psychiatry by spreading information about it, as well as contributing to the need for it. - Alfred Hitchcock

2012-01-26T06:56:00.001-05:00

Humor is by far the most significant activity of the human brain. - Edward De Bono

2012-01-25T07:22:00.001-05:00

Water, taken in moderation, cannot hurt anybody. - Mark Twain

2012-01-24T11:25:00.001-05:00

Stoop and you'll be stepped on; stand tall and you'll be shot at. - Carlos A. Urbizo

2012-01-24T09:45:00.001-05:00

I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts. - Will Rogers

2012-01-22T04:43:00.001-05:00

If you make people think they're thinking, they'll love you; But if you really make them think, they'll hate you. - Don Marquis

2012-01-20T10:31:00.001-05:00

Think of what would happen to us in America if there were no humorists; life would be one long Congressional Record. - Tom Masson

2012-01-19T13:57:00.001-05:00

A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing. - George Bernard Shaw

2012-01-18T07:24:00.001-05:00

O Lord, help me to be pure, but not yet. - Saint Augustine

2012-01-17T06:56:00.001-05:00

The only thing that lasts longer than a friend's love is the stupidity that keeps us from knowing any better. - Randy K. Milholland

2012-01-16T11:40:00.001-05:00

Walking isn't a lost art: one must, by some means, get to the garage. - Evan Esar

2012-01-16T06:55:00.001-05:00

“ We must accept finite disappointment, but we must never lose infinite hope. ” --Martin Luther King, Jr.

2012-01-15T08:43:00.001-05:00

You see what power is - holding someone else's fear in your hand and showing it to them!
Amy Tan (1952 - )

2012-01-13T09:59:00.001-05:00

Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and he'll buy a funny hat. Talk to a hungry man about fish, and you're a consultant. - Scott Adams

2012-01-12T10:35:00.001-05:00

The belief in a supernatural source of evil is not necessary; men alone are quite capable of every wickedness. - Joseph Conrad

2012-01-10T06:05:00.001-05:00

I don't generally feel anything until noon; then it's time for my nap. - Bob Hope

2012-01-09T06:58:00.001-05:00

It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech. - Mark Twain

2012-01-08T07:37:00.001-05:00

When they discover the center of the universe, a lot of people will be disappointed to discover they are not it. - Bernard Bailey

2012-01-06T10:29:00.001-05:00

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2012-01-05T16:25:00.001-05:00

Misery no longer loves company. Nowadays it insists on it. - Russell Baker

2012-01-05T07:39:00.001-05:00

I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals. - Sir Winston Churchill

2012-01-04T12:05:00.001-05:00

One man alone can be pretty dumb sometimes, but for real bona fide stupidity, there ain't nothin' can beat teamwork. - Edward Abbey

2012-01-04T07:14:00.001-05:00

Every great advance in natural knowledge has involved the absolute rejection of authority. - Thomas H. Huxley

2012-01-03T07:23:00.001-05:00

Society, my dear, is like salt water, good to swim in but hard to swallow. - Arthur Stringer

2012-01-03T01:39:00.001-05:00

Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution yet. - Mae West

2012-01-01T07:01:00.001-05:00

Strange as it seems, no amount of learning can cure stupidity, and higher education positively fortifies it. - Stephen Vizinczey

2011-12-31T07:43:00.001-05:00

It's never just a game when you're winning. - George Carlin

2011-12-30T08:38:00.001-05:00

The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and science. - Albert Einstein

2011-12-29T22:36:00.001-05:00

I finally figured out the only reason to be alive is to enjoy it. - Rita Mae Brown

2011-12-28T07:37:00.001-05:00

In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards. - Mark Twain

2011-12-26T07:50:00.001-05:00

What others think of us would be of little moment did it not, when known, so deeply tinge what we think of ourselves. - Paul Valery

2011-12-24T08:26:00.001-05:00

There is only one difference between a madman and me. I am not mad. - Salvador Dali

2011-12-23T07:53:00.001-05:00

Anger is the feeling that makes your mouth work faster than your mind. - Evan Esar

2011-12-22T09:08:00.001-05:00

A jury consists of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer. - Robert Frost

2011-12-21T05:10:00.001-05:00

There are a terrible lot of lies going around the world, and the worst of it is half of them are true. - Sir Winston Churchill

2011-12-20T13:00:00.001-05:00

“ The last of the human freedoms - to choose
one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way. ” ....Viktor Frankl

2011-12-19T05:55:00.001-05:00

Silence propagates itself, and the longer talk has been suspended, the more difficult it is to find anything to say. - Samuel Johnson

2011-12-17T18:47:00.001-05:00

Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names. - John F. Kennedy

2011-12-16T08:40:00.001-05:00

Only dull people are brilliant at breakfast. - Oscar Wilde

2011-12-15T15:10:00.001-05:00

Any fool can make a rule, and any fool will mind it. - Henry David Thoreau

2011-12-14T09:50:00.001-05:00

I have never met a man so ignorant that I couldn't learn something from him. - Galileo Galilei

2011-12-13T12:12:00.001-05:00

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines. - John Benfield

2011-12-12T06:32:00.001-05:00

Life is a sexually transmitted disease. - R. D. Laing

2011-12-11T07:34:00.001-05:00

Ours is the age that is proud of machines that think and suspicious of men who try to. - H. Mumford Jones

2011-12-10T07:15:00.001-05:00

I was going to have cosmetic surgery until I noticed that the doctor's office was full of portraits by Picasso. - Rita Rudner

2011-12-09T19:46:00.001-05:00

The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's just sort of a tired feeling. - Paula Poundstone

2011-12-09T05:49:00.001-05:00

When people are free to do as they please, they usually imitate each other. - Eric Hoffer

2011-12-08T23:41:00.001-05:00

We know what happens to people who stay in the middle of the road. They get run over. - Aneurin Bevan

2011-12-08T21:30:00.001-05:00

Everything you can imagine is real. - Pablo Picasso

2011-12-07T06:57:00.001-05:00

Nobody can be exactly like me. Sometimes even I have trouble doing it. - Tallulah Bankhead

2011-12-06T07:36:00.001-05:00

Most people have seen worse things in private than they pretend to be shocked at in public. - Edgar Watson Howe

2011-12-05T06:06:00.001-05:00

Martyrdom... is the only way in which a man can become famous without ability. - George Bernard Shaw

2011-12-04T09:18:00.001-05:00

I think that somehow, we learn who we really are and then live with that decision. - Eleanor Roosevelt

2011-12-03T07:28:00.001-05:00

I like persons better than principles, and I like persons with no principles better than anything else in the world. - Oscar Wilde

2011-11-30T19:15:00.001-05:00

We're all in this alone. - Lily Tomlin

2011-11-30T13:33:00.001-05:00

When a person cannot deceive himself the chances are against his being able to deceive other people. - Mark Twain

2011-11-29T07:59:00.001-05:00

Disbelief in magic can force a poor soul into believing in government and business. - Tom Robbins

2011-11-28T07:09:00.001-05:00

Most people would rather be certain they're miserable than risk being happy. - Robert Anthony

2011-11-26T09:15:00.001-05:00

Some circumstantial evidence is very strong, as when you find a trout in the milk. - Henry David Thoreau

2011-11-24T07:07:00.001-05:00

The greatest mistake is trying to be more agreeable than you can be. - Walter Bagehot

2011-11-23T19:56:00.001-05:00

Most of the change we think we see in life is due to truths being in and out of favor. - Robert Frost

2011-11-20T07:14:00.001-05:00

Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent. - Isaac Asimov

2011-11-18T07:37:00.001-05:00

Happiness in intelligent people is the rarest thing I know. - Ernest Hemingway

2011-11-17T07:10:00.001-05:00

Brain: an apparatus with which we think we think. - Ambrose Bierce

2011-11-16T12:34:00.001-05:00

Someday we'll look back on this moment and plow into a parked car. - Evan Davis

2011-11-15T04:12:00.001-05:00

Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there. - Will Rogers

2011-11-14T14:45:00.001-05:00

‎"To change one's life: Start immediately. Do it flamboyantly. No exceptions." ~William James~

2011-11-14T05:43:00.001-05:00

Who is rich? He that is content. Who is that? Nobody. - Benjamin Franklin

2011-11-13T07:52:00.001-05:00

Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work. - Thomas A. Edison

2011-11-12T16:49:00.001-05:00

Not to be absolutely certain is, I think, one of the essential things in rationality. - Bertrand Russell

2011-11-11T05:18:00.001-05:00

Good judgment comes from experience, and often experience comes from bad judgment. - Rita Mae Brown

2011-11-10T05:06:00.001-05:00

Never try to tell everything you know. It may take too short a time. - Norman Ford

2011-11-08T06:22:00.001-05:00

Consistency is the last refuge of the unimaginative. - Oscar Wilde

2011-11-06T07:19:00.001-05:00

In America, through pressure of conformity, there is freedom of choice, but nothing to choose from. - Peter Ustinov

2011-11-05T08:37:00.001-04:00

Some people will never learn anything because they understand everything too soon. - Alexander Pope

2011-11-04T04:04:00.001-04:00

The art of medicine consists in amusing the patient while nature cures the disease. - Voltaire

2011-11-03T16:26:00.001-04:00

Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip. - Will Rogers

2011-11-02T06:36:00.001-04:00

So much of what we call management consists in making it difficult for people to work. - Peter Drucker

2011-11-01T12:27:00.001-04:00

Laughter is the closest distance between two people. - Victor Borge

2011-11-01T06:39:00.001-04:00

A censor is a man who knows more than he thinks you ought to. - Granville Hicks

2011-10-31T06:30:00.001-04:00

There are two tragedies in life. One is not to get your heart's desire. The other is to get it. - George Bernard Shaw

2011-10-30T16:32:00.001-04:00

The goal of all inanimate objects is to resist man and ultimately defeat him. - Russell Baker

2011-10-30T11:54:00.001-04:00

There is no pleasure in having nothing to do; the fun is in having lots to do and not doing it. - Mary Wilson Little

2011-10-29T10:18:00.001-04:00

Sometimes the mind, for reasons we don't necessarily understand, just decides to go to the store for a quart of milk. - Andrew Schneider

2011-10-28T05:40:00.001-04:00

The young have aspirations that never come to pass, the old have reminiscences of what never happened. - Saki

2011-10-27T07:06:00.001-04:00

There is no abstract art. You must always start with something. Afterward you can remove all traces of reality. - Pablo Picasso

2011-10-26T06:39:00.001-04:00

The follies which a man regrets most, in his life, are those which he didn't commit when he had the opportunity. - Helen Rowland

2011-10-25T19:03:00.001-04:00

Politics is the art of preventing people from taking part in affairs which properly concern them. - Paul Valery

2011-10-25T06:53:00.001-04:00

Man is the only animal that can remain on friendly terms with the victims he intends to eat until he eats them. - Samuel Butler

2011-10-23T18:48:00.001-04:00

Pity the meek, for they shall inherit the earth. - Don Marquis

2011-10-23T07:59:00.001-04:00

Everything is funny as long as it is happening to Somebody Else. - Will Rogers

2011-10-22T17:41:00.001-04:00

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight. - Phyllis Diller